I’m not talking about peanut butter, but parenting. We don’t really classify ourselves as anything when it comes to parenting, but if we were, I think we’d fall into the “chewy” category since we’re kind of all over the place and really just do what is best for our family. We had to use formula, we use disposable diapers, sometimes I make baby food, but often we buy organic baby food when we aren’t doing some form of BLW (baby led weaning). We have a couple of strollers, but also baby carriers because I like to wear Phoebe – it’s often easier and she usually enjoys it. We vaccinate our kids who are in day care full-time, and while they have their own beds, they slept almost exclusively in ours for the first 6 months. So, I thought today we’d talk about bed-sharing and why we like it so much.
A lot of parents do a form of co-sleeping with their babies for the first few month, most often in the form of a crib or bassinet in the same room, which is also what we started with in the beginning. We actually bought a king-size bed when Enzo was small just so that it would be big enough for all 3 of us, which might sound strange to some people, but it has worked really well for us. I think we started putting Enzo in our bed just because it was so much easier than the bassinet and he slept better. Neither Josh or I move around a lot when we sleep so we never worried about squashing him by accident. When he was 6 months old, we decided to move him to his own bed simply because he started moving around a lot and we weren’t sleeping well. To this day, though, he sometimes ends up in our bed – whether it be due to not feeling well or having a bad dream… or whatever it may be. The same with Phoebe as well. For the most part she primarily sleeps in her crib, but on bad nights we just bring her into our room because it’s far less disruptive than having to get up and go check on her multiple times.
The thing I love about bed-sharing (even though the kids aren’t there as often anymore) was/is that it’s great bonding time for us. Josh and I work full-time, so it was especially nice to have the kids close when they were babies. We’re also the kind of family that likes to just pile up in bed where it’s nice and comfy and all cuddle and watch a movie. Even during the week, I’d often much rather just get comfy in bed to watch TV then to go downstairs and sit on the couch. I know some people consider their bedroom (and bed especially) to be their sacred private space, and I totally understand that… for me, that’s just kind of changed, though. I get ready for work in my bathroom, so it’s not uncommon for one or both of the kids to be in our room hanging out while I do that, and I really hope that never changes. I always want our kids to feel welcome to come and talk to us about anything and everything, and while I’m not against closed doors, I want ours to be as open as possible. We’ll teach the kids to respect our space and each others’ space, but I hope we have a great many more snuggle fests in our big “family” bed for years to come.
Now, in terms of safety – I really don’t bed-sharing is unsafe. As with anything, it can be done safely or unsafely, it’s just a matter of knowing how to do it the right way. There are so many resources out there, and I encourage families to do what is right for them.
I think I will (someday) be a mostly crunchy momma with a side of chewy. But it’s so hard to tell! My parents did your style of bed-sharing also…we were always welcome during bad nights of sleep!
I had definitely wanted to be more crunchy (cloth diapers, and wanted to breastfeed, and had grand plans of making all baby food, but… life happens. I think whatever way you end up parenting will be the right one. 😉